Accented Assassinations

Accents are the cornerstone of identification for many strangers. In ancient Israel one tribe would identify a foreigner by asking them to say specific words that were pronounced incorrectly if one did not hail from a certain area. Today, possibly the most ridiculous accent comes from eastern Massachusetts. Examples of this would be Tom Hank’s portrayal of a Bostonian FBI agent in the film Catch Me If You Can. Hanks touts his attempted accent in a seemingly ridiculous way. That is, until you take a look at a true Bostonian, namely Congressman Barney Frank. This flamboyant Congressman’s tirades are filled with outrageous nonsense which is only topped by the gavel he slams in protest against those who ask him to speak in English.

The crazy lengthening of syllables found in Boston accents is well depicted in these examples:
Normal = How are you? / Boston = How ahw yah?
Normal = Barney Frank / Boston = Bwawney Fwank

Just look up any YouTube video and you will be instantly perplexed and entertained by the ridiculous sounds you hear from this Daffy-Duck Congressman. Even our 35th President, Jackie, hailed from Massachusetts and his speeches were muddled with Bostonian flavor that led to his eventual assassination in 1963. This horrific event that devastated the nation was due to a simple accentual misunderstanding that bothered a man so much that he was driven to insanity and eventually committed a heinous crime against America.